Awkward Moment Forty Three: Accidentally Talking to Yourself

Hello, this is awkward. I hate those times when I accidentally talk to myself. I know you're probably thinking, how the heck does that happen? How does one "accidentally" talk to oneself? It is a lot easier than you would think. There are actually two ways for this to occur.

Scenario #1: I am walking down the street. Shoot, I have to cross the road now. I step out onto the pavement and a car almost doesn't stop. "Don't hit me!" I say. Shoot, I just said that out loud. I hope no one heard that. Or saw that. Too bad the whole world has stopped to let me cross the road so everyone did. Unless they are all coveniently and simultaneously blind/deaf.

Scenario #2: I am walking down the hallway with a friend blabbing on about some story (probably one of those ones that are hilarious to me and no one else). I turn my head to look at this "friend" and she's gone. Must have been some story I was telling. Where the heck did she go?! I stop and laugh to myself because I am just so cool and because I spent a yet to be determined amount of time talking to myself in loud and dulcet tones, for everyone to hear. Love it.

So you get the idea. It happens to the best of us but that doesn't make it any less AWKWARD!!!

-Millie

Awkward Moment Forty Two: Hotel Rooms

During Spring Break my family and I went to Seattle! We stayed in a really nice hotel, it was so posh! I was so excited! Of course, being the immature 17 year old girl that I am, I wanted to run up and down the hallways. Don't worry I restrained myself. On the first night, I went to get ice for our room. We really didn't need it, but because it was free and I was staying in a hotel, I wanted it. Me, being the jokster I am, wanted to play a trick on my family. I go up to my door and knock on it really loud, saying room service in a weird voice. No one answers. Hmmm, those buggers must be ignoring me. I pound on the door saying have you checked the children. To my surprise a little Asian lady answers the door. That is definitely not my mother. I stand there shocked. I quickly apologize and admit I thought this was my room. Too bad she barely understand English. She looks confused and I just smile, apologize again, and quickly walk away. I am left feeling awkward and embaressed. Of course, my family thinks it is hilarious! AWKWARD!!

Update!

Hello followers! Sorry we have not updated this blog in three weeks! Wow! We did not realise it was this long! While we were on Spring Break we decided to take a week break because some of us were going away, and to be honest we needed a break from writing on this everyday. Well that one week break turned into three, but now we are back at it. School has been really busy, with scholarships due, as well as grad trans, but that is no excuse. Instead of blogging everyday, we are each going to post one awkward moment a week. It was starting to become a bit of a hassle and we wanted to keep this fun. But don't worry we are not stopping anytime soon! Thank you to everyone who reads our blog, even though it is about 5 of you. We really appreciate it!! Oh! Also we are trying to upload more videos to our youtube channel, www.youtube.com/theawkwardbloggers so stayed tuned for those!

The Awkward Bloggers

Awkward Moment Forty One: Attractive Waiters

So, I went to The Keg for dinner with my parents and sister the other night. I was not very happy about it because it’s a nice place, and we had just gotten back from a trip. I hadn’t showered that morning, I showered the night before, but my hair reeked like chlorine! I’m not kidding, I think I showered 5 times scrubbing my head with baking powder before it went away. Anyways I didn’t look the nicest, wearing tennis sneakers, jean capris and a cardigan while everyone else was in heels and fancy dresses. So we sit down, got comfortable when all the sudden the waiter comes. Whoa. He was cute. Not to mention probably in his mid-late 20’s. I tried to act normally, believe me I really did try. But, his personality and amazing waiter skills were not helping the situation. He was really good; super friendly and funny. He knelt down right beside you when you ordered, and gave his opinion. AND HE KEPT SMILING AT ME! Like, more than normal…maybe it was in my head, but I’m pretty sure he kept smirking at me. Then he left our table and my mum says, “He is CUTE! You should get a job here, then you would have boyfriends!” I was already feeling awkward to begin with, but then every time he came to our table I felt like I couldn’t even look at him because …. I don’t know why, I was feeling uncomfortable. When I finally did look up, he flashed that smile! Ugggh. SO AWKWARD! It wasn't even an awkward moment I could laugh about after either, it was an inner awkward moment! Those are the worst! AWKWARD!

-Georgie 

Awkward Moment Forty: Yoga

I love yoga so much and I do it lots. It makes me less awkward because it's my time by myself. I don't know why, I just feel independent going to yoga by myself. Still, there are so many awkward scenarios that go on during yoga. Like farting. I have a rule and it is called "don't fart in public" but the thing is, yoga squishes me into very weird positions and sometimes it's hard to not let it go when your head is resting on your left knee and your right leg is resting on your head and your touching your left foot with your right hand and.. you get it right? I mean, I am not made of silly putty and sometimes it escapes. But since everyone in the yoga studio is pretty close together you can't even hope that it would go by unnoticed. You can only hope that they don't acknowledge it and then you go into denial and pretend that that didn't just happen. Also, it's weird sticking my bum in people's faces or when people stick their bums in my face. I think that's pretty self explanatory. And camel toe which comes from wearing form fitting yoga pants and doing bridge which is when you basically lift your crotch to the sky. It's really uncomfortable when your instructor occasionally comes to adjust you and this happens and it's like why. Why. Or when they chant and I focus really hard on not laughing. It's not even that funny anymore because I am so used to it but it's just like when someone yells at you and you can't help but laugh. Just knowing you shouldn't laugh makes it impossible not to. I feel bad to and I want to be like I am sorry, I know better! I do! It's just dead quiet and then it's like..................OOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM....... It's something I have basically gotten used to but there are days when I feel like hysterically laughing. So yoga is great and it's like exercise that doesn't make me want to cry. But be prepared for the awkward, and invest in a thong or seamless panties because you know what's more embarassing then sticking your tush in someone's face? Pantylines while you are sticking it in someone's face. Awkward!!
-Flora

Awkward Moment Thirty Nine: Farting

Poooooofttttt! If you're me, then you're extremely immature and find farting hilarious, embarrassing and awkward. I know it is just a natural bodily function but it's so funny! And it's even funnier/awkward when it's in front of a group of people. Usually when this happens people pretend they did not hear it, but there is always that one really obnoxious person who think it's funny to point it out and laugh. That's always super nice of them.

Everybody has a few good farting stories to tell. I know I sure do. One of them did not happen to me, but it was a dance teacher's group that had gone on stage for acro competition. For those of you who know acro, it involves a lot of lifts and backbends, cartwheels, that kind of thing. So this one girl was the smallest girl in the class and she got lifted for every lift in the dance. The music was super dramatic and there was one part of the song that went completely silent right as they were lifting the girl... when this happened she suddenly she let out a very loud fart. EVERY one heard. The entire audience! She was mortified! I know I would never be able to live that one down.

But then there are just those moments when you're hanging out with friends and you're laughing super hard and just can't help but let one (or 2 or 3) go. It's unfortunate, but it happens to the best of us! It really isn't so bad if you're with friends, but if you aren't then it is just plain awkward. It makes me think of a funny saying that my grandma used to say. It doesn't really translate from Finnish properly, but it basically means "farts are the joy of the poor". In other words, well it's pretty self-explanatory, but she would say that whenever someone, including herself, farted! To be honest with you, I think that would just make it even more AWKWARD!

Awkward Moment Thirty Eight: Seeing people from school when you are working

Imagine you are working away, happy as a clam, or in my case, as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs (yes I searched that up), when you see not one but two people from your school. Yes, for the normal people of the world this would be an easy situation. You would say hello, maybe discuss some other business. But for us awkward folks, we are in our prime moment. First, you begin to come up with ideas to avoid this situation. When you finally realise they are not going anywhere and neither are you, you begin to come up with another plan. Of course my usual plan of attack (hiding, walking the other direction, avoiding eye contact) would not work here. So they other day, on our last day of training, I was packing bags. I was super nervous! I did not want to screw anything up. My hands were shaking, but luckily the guy I was packing bags for was super nice. Anyways, as I am bagging I see two kids from my school, who happen to be going out, come into my isle. Great! This kid also happens to be one of those annoying boys who tries to make you feel uncomfortable. As he comes up to the till I pretend I am extremely focused on bagging the bags. Just as I look up, he is staring at me. I smile and say hi, and he smiles back. This makes me even more nervous because I have to do an extra good packing job. So now my hands are shaking, my face is beet red (from heat and seeing someone), and I probably look really nervous. So after what seems like 40 hours, they leave and I say bye. AWKWARD!

Mia

Awkward Moment Thirty Seven: When your bra unclasps in public or school for no apparent reason.

This is another one of those awkward moments that happen just between you and yourself. All of the sudden you feel the hooks on your bra slowly start to undo. You think "do I have time to run to the bathroom?" Of course, by the time you are done thinking that, it's already undone. There goes that option. You think everyone is staring at you. Panic is rushes through you. It's got to be obvious. I mean, your bra is practically falling off! You look around sketchily, thinking about the best way to go about fixing this. You stealthy get up, act as if nothing is wrong although you probably look quite stressed out, and ask the teacher to go to the bathroom. Then all H. E. DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS breaks loose. You run to the bathroom, slam the stall door closed, and re hook those clasps. The feeling is amazing. Finally relief. Ahh, that situation was AWKWARD!

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Thirty Six:Talking to someone you dont like

We all love our friends. But sometimes our friends like things or people for reasons that we cannot understand. And that's absolutely fine! Just because I happen to think that girl in French is an irritating, bitchy suck up doesn't mean that she doesn't have a heart of gold. So if your friend is friends with someone you are not particularly fond of the best thing to do is be supportive and sensitive and, unless your friend's friend is a complete psycho, trust their judgement enough to know that there is probably something good about that person. But do you want to know what is unfortunate? When you don't know that your friend is friends with said biatch and you start babbling away about how much he or she annoys you and do they like her? And then they say "....Yeah, they are one of my best friends...." And you feel not only like a cow but also completely awkward! The first thing I think is damage control. What can I do to fix this? I can't be like "HA. Just kidding, I love them.." I could be like " Okay good. I was just testing you" or theres what I always do which is get really awkward and blush nervously and make indescernable sounds. The other day I was sitting with this girl I used to be friends with named Aretha and I am not friends with her anymore but she is still friends with my friend Rosaline. So, I try not to make it obvious that I don't like her but Rosaline knows I don't, I try to be subtle, what can I say. Anyways, so we went to a class in our freeblock to do work and we sat with lovely Aretha. I was sitting right across from my former friend and I couldn't handle the tension. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a butter knife. So I randomly say "Hi Aretha..." She looks at me weirdly and says hi. I then felt like I should say something else, so I said "..Happy birthday.." knowing full well that her birthday was two weeks ago but not knowing what else to say. She tells me this and I was like oh and that was it. Awkward!

-Flora

Awkward Moment Thirty Five: Walking down the hallway and laughing to yourself

Could my life be just a teensy bit more awkward? I really don't think it's awkward enough! I hate those moments when you're walking or sitting by yourself and something is just so hilarious that you can't even control it so you start laughing maniacally and all of the sane and innocent bystanders think you are an absolute lunatic. Gosh, those poor people are all within the realm of crazy. There is no getting out! You have witnessed the awkward now you must experience it for yourself! Just kidding. You can keep your sanity. No one needs to be awkward, that's what we're here for.

Today, I was walking down the hallway, thinking dolefully about the awkward blog and how I would love to go post on it, when this strange thought popped into my head. I was thinking of "Alcohol Annonymous" meetings and how they all introduce themselves and explain their problems but in my head it was "Awkward Anonymous" and I was introducing myself saying "Hi, my name is Millie and I am an awkward kid." And in unison the room replies "Hello Millie." And for some reason it sent me into hysterics! It started out as a light giggle, but the more I thought about it the more I needed to laugh. I was biting the sides of my cheeks trying to hold it in, but I just couldn't do it. So I was full on grinning from ear to ear and shaking with silent laughter while strolling- no not strolling, practically running-down the hallway to get to my class. I wasn't even close to being late but I figured the sooner I got to my class where my friends would be sitting, the sooner I could resume my status as a normal person who is just casually chuckling amongst friends. I turn the corner, take a flying leap into the class only to see two empty chairs where my friends should have been. I was so prepared to start rolling around on the floor laughing, when they weren't even there! Bloody hell! I just need to get this laugh out, and I need to get it out NOW! People are starting to stare. AWKWARD!

-Millie

Awkward Moment Thirty Four: Staff Rooms

How awkward are these! Most people sit around and chat with people they know. But for new people, who know nobody, it can get pretty awkward. I sit there avoiding eye contact with everybody, pretending to be concentrating very hard on reading a very "interesting" newspaper.  I don't really care what the stocks are doing but everyone in the staff room is thinking I do.
On Wednesday, during break, I was casually sitting in the room minding my own business, when I hear a boy in my grades voice. Awesome! More ways for me to be awkward! Instead of saying hi like a normal person, I pretend I am reading the newspaper. He goes and sits on the other side of the room, and I am pretty sure he saw me. Its not like I can look over and stare at him. That would be creepy. So I just ignore it. Now the only thing I can think of is I look like a total cow! It it not like I don't want to say hi, its just I want to save myself the awkwardness. We all know how I am with seeing people out of school...... Also remember when I told you guys about the girl I saw in the grocery store and how I was avoiding her, and then it was awkward? Well that's where I work now. I can't wait until I see her during break...... AWKWARD!!!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Thirty Three: School Games

So, this shouldn’t be awkward. Well for most people it isn’t, but for the four of us, school games and events are super awkward. Wednesday was not a good day for us. The whole Kit situation happened just before our schools dodge ball tournament. After going on our 10 km walk, we decided to stay and watch the dodge ball tournament. We knew a couple of people on our schools team, so we thought it would be fun to watch. Boy were we wrong! Our schools team had about 25 of their friends there to cheer them on. They are all super outgoing, loud, and close to each other. When the four of us walked in, we stood awkwardly in front of the bleachers trying to decide where to sit. Finally, we chose seats about halfway up the bleachers; not too close to the 25 intimidating people. Before the game started, our team decided it would be fun to do the wave. It’s a normal thing to do at a game. I don’t know how Millie, Flora, or Mia felt, but I felt sooooo awkward. I sat there and pretended I didn’t know what was going on, and that I was in the middle of a deep conversation with Millie! I heard a couple of them shout “You have no school spirit” or something along those lines. And once again, I pretended I didn’t know what was going on. Why did I not join in? That my friend is a very good question. I have not stopped asking myself that since the incident. Now I am traumatized, and everyone thinks we’re losers. AWKWARD!

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Thirty two: Crushes

Crushes. It's so ridiculous. Sure, in some ways they are fun. They bring about warm and fuzzy feelings and cute little fantasies straight out of the Notebook ( I love that movie, so cute, Nicholas Sparks is a genius ). I don't normally get crushes I am happy to say. I like boys in general but it's usually just oh, you are really cute and then ten minutes later I forget again. Every now and then though it happens. What can you do? It happens to all of us! And as cute as crushes are, it can make for some very awkward moments. You know the random blushing and butterflies? The inability to look at them in the eye. You feel like they know but obviously they don't unless they can suddenly read minds. It's just so awkward! And they have no idea! It's even worse because it's an awkward moment you are having all by yourself! Here is an example. The last time I had a crush it was this guy who was a couple years older than me. He was so different than me. He didn't look that badass or "gangster" or anything. He looked like he tried to be though, I am not going to lie. He was well dressed and cute in a scruffy kind of way. He wasn't shaven which is kind of cute in my opinion. I am not saying I 'd like a yeti but a little stubble is kind of hot. He smoked weed a lot though and was a party guy and that is really not my scene. He seemed to be a nice guy though but basically he is pretty much the definition of the kind of guy I shouldn't of been interested in. I was fifteen and as naive as can be. I was not a party girl and it was just so awkward. We were in a class together and my friend Rosaline knew I had a crush on him so she would be like "oh Bob come sit with Flora!" even though Millie sat with me. Then we were in a group thing and she was like "I am so glad we have Flora and Bob in our group.Flora and Bob."  And then Millie asked for her chair back and Bob was like sure and then Rosaline said "You homewrecker." Another time she turned to me, smelled me and said "mmm you smell like cotton candy. Bob she smells like cotton candy!" It really was awkward. There were other things too, like turning into a mime whenever he was around and blushing. I said dumb things too, like I told him puffins freak me out. Puffins.Freak.Me out. Who says that? You know of all the things to say that just seemed like the way to go. Awkward!
-Flora

Awkward Moment Thirty One: Spacing out when someone's talking to you.

"Hello Millie." Pause. "Hi?" Pause. "So what's going on?" Pause. "Millie?"
What? You were talking to me? Oh, I thought you were talking to the other Millie in the room. Oh, the room's empty? What do you know. Well I know that this is so ridiculously awkward. It is not an enjoyable experience when someone is trying to talk to you and you're completely off in another world. It is awkward enough for the talker (causing them to look and feel like they are talking to themselves), let alone for the person who is spacing out (perhaps creating an unwanted impression of awkwardness and rudeness). Neither is appreciated.

Today Flora, Georgie, Mia and I all took part in a 10 km walk to raise money for the kids in Uganda. Afterwards, we sat, ate pizza, and chatted it up in the cooking classroom. We were completely wiped out from all the walking and had all simultaneously spaced out. Kit conveniently chose this moment to come over and say hello. We awkwardly say "hi" and continue to shovel pizza into our mouths at light speed and stare at the walls. Because, you know, it's not like the pizza will stay on our plates. It might just magically disappear. So of course it is completely necessary to practically inhale it. And it's always fun to just make an awkward situation even more awkward because I now have tomato sauce smeared all over my face and bits of chewed up pepperoni stuck in my teeth. I should not be allowed to eat in public. Anyways, I am think that chances are we don't look like the most inviting bunch of kids because he then says "I don't want to break up your little posse". He stands there for another few minutes as we stare blankly off into space, and I'm sure he has probably begun to feel awkward by this point. Eventually, he casually saunters off. I laugh to myself awkwardly while everyone else slowly comes out of their little reverie. "Guys, that was super awkward." Once everyone is aware of just how awkward that awkward little situation was, we begin to plan out a course of action. Pfft, who are we kidding, our course of action is more like sit here and discuss it until our mouths are dry and our brains are fried and then pretend like it never happened. But this time Flora steps in and demands to repair the damage. She begins to panic, whereas Mia, Georgie and I just nervously look around, at a complete loss for words.. and actions. Do we apologize? What do we do? Not only do we seem awkward, but also just flat out rude. Do we explain to him "Hey, so we're just socially awkward, sorry about that." Uh oh, he's walking back over to our table! And he's brought his best friends, Jones and Millard! Even better. I happen to have a slight crush on Millard, and start looking around the room frantically, hoping to not catch his eye. I am quite convinced that he knows that I like him, except how the heck would he? They say hello and Flora bravely blurts out "We're sorry about earlier when we all ignored you" And I chip in with "yeah, sorry, that was rude of us!" He laughs and says "Yeah, I felt like a bit of an idiot." And Mia and Georgie explain that we were just spacing out, inconveniently all at the same time, cause apparently that's just how we like to do things. And I sit there and smile, feeling like I am either smiling too big, not big enough, or maybe even both at the same time. Even though I'm probably not smiling at all. It's starting to feel a bit more like a grimace. And Millard is just chilling there with his cute face and all I can think is: AWKWARD!!!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Thirty: Umbrella's

Maybe it is just me but I think umbrella's extremely awkward. I know I have already done a blog post of umbrellas in the wind but I decided a whole post needs to be dedicated to umbrella's. Umbrella's themselves are not particularly awkward but they do cause a heak of a lot of awkward moments.
1. They like to flip inside out (which I have already discussed)
2. They have problems opening
3. They have problems closing
4. They sometimes do no stay closed
5. When they are wet they could cause awkward wet marks on your pants, particularly in the crotch/ butt area.
6. If they are broken you could poke someones eye out which would be extremely awkward.

Well a couple weeks ago I was walking to the bus and it was pouring rain. My old, nice umbrella that I loved, broke! Guess where? In the wind storm from my last umbrella post!! So I was using this umbrella that is rusting and broken. I have my bus ticket in my hand and my binder and 4 textbooks in my arms. I usually put 2 textbooks in my binder so they are not falling but I didn't today because I thought I could handle it. Apparently not! As I get to the bus stop I see the bus coming. I waited until the bus was about 1 minute away and then tried to close my umbrella. Key word tried! I am struggling to close my umbrella, books falling, when I decide to ask the guy standing at the bus stop. He is about 3 years younger than me. I quietly say excuse me. Too bad he has his music blasting in his ears so it looks like I am talking to myself. The bus finally comes and I am still standing there hunched over like The Hunchback of Notre Dame, struggling to hold my books, while getting soaking wet. I finally get it closed when it pops back open. I try a couple more times, while the bus driver is waiting for me, looking annoyed. I finally close it and go onto the bus. By this time my hands are shaking and I have issues putting my bus pass into the holder. The umbrella is getting me soaking wet and books and pretty much on the ground. The bus driver drives and if you know me I cannot for the life of me walk on buses. So I am falling all over the place making a complete fool out of myself. Georgie is just sitting there laughing. So AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Twenty Nine: Seeing old friends.

Any normal person can act normal around an old friend that they haven’t talked to in a while. Me, I’m not normal. I suffer from social awkwardism. Symptoms include: flushing of the face, loss of words, embarrassment, paranoia, and last but not least, awkwardness. Let me tell you, it’s not a pleasant thing.

Anyways, I had an awkward experience at the bus the other day. I was standing at the bus stop waiting patiently as I always do every Monday. There were a bunch of kids from my school standing around me, everyone silent. It’s really awful because technically, I should have my drivers licence. But instead, I stand at the bus stop every Monday, and every Monday I watch kids from my classes stare at me, as they drive themselves home. So I’m waiting, and I see two girls walking towards the bus stop, one whom I used to be really close with and the other whom makes me very uncomfortable. This friend used to drive me to school every day for four years! And there I was standing at the bus stop. It was quite obvious that they were staring at me, but they were far enough away that I could pretend I didn’t see them. I already feel awkward at bus stops, so I know I must have looked so sketchy! I waited until they were just across the street from me until I finally looked. Yup. They were staring all right. Then my old friend started yelling at me from across the street. She’s yelling, cars are whipping past, and it’s loud. I had no idea what she was saying. Then I figured it out. She was asking why I was bussing. So I’m trying to act normal while trying to yell back ,“ I have no ride home on Mondays!” No one at the bus stop knew who I was talking too, and my friend couldn’t hear me. Awesome. I tried to yell louder but it wasn’t working. So she takes out her phone and signals to me that she would text me. Then, while trying to balance all my books, I had to rummage through my purse to find my phone-I might add that I hate me phone. It’s so ugly. The whole situation was just very awkward. I know it’s really not a big deal, but because of my social awkwardism, everything is a big deal. AWKWARD!

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Twenty Eight: When Sales People Attack

  I don't think it is in the sales people's job description to make me uncomfortable and awkward.I get it, they are just doing their job. I am sure they resent having to be so over the top nice just as much as I do. And  I am probably the one making it awkward, I mean I can't even help it, it's like breathing for me. There really shouldn't be anything awkward about it! These people are paid to be nice to me; they are smiling at me and suggesting clothes to me as though we have been best friends for years. The issue for me is that when I shop, I like it to be just between me and the clothes. I don't want to have to talk to anyone. I talk all damn day for pete's sakes! And also, I feel the need to make lame conversation with any random person who says something to me because I feel like I m rude if I don't. This is especially bad when I am shopping by myself because then I already feel like a loser and I just want to go in, get whatever it is I want and then get out. It never fails. I go in to the store, cautiously look around to make sure that there aren't any sales people in plain view and then I go in. Just when I feel myself begin to relax and shop, they ambush me. " Hi! Can I help you with anything? Blah blah blah is half off if you get this blah blah. Would you like this free thing?" How about no! I would kindly appreciate it if you went away. But that's rude and my mama taught me better than that. So I frantically say "Oh no,no I am just looking, thank you, but thats cool, but no I am good. Yeah. Thanks!" then I smile way too big and go really red and then stumble back into whatever I was doing. Five minutes later. "Oh, that's really nice! You know if you like this you might like this too!" WHY? I would like it if you went away! Please shoo. That's about the time when I decide that I don't really need to wear clothes anyway and I leave. So gosh darn awkward.
-Flora

Awkward Moment Twenty Seven: When your parents embarrass you

You’ve gotta love that awful scenario of being out somewhere in public and having your parents talking their mouths off to total strangers about who the heck knows what, oblivious to the beautifully bright shade of red that your face is turning. That is just so much fun. I’d rather cliff dive onto cement. How about the time I was at the grocery store and my dad decides to really actively participate in the selection of my feminine products. Dad, this is not the same as downloading computer software. Come on, let’s just stick to what we know. Clearly you are not receiving the telepathic messages I am frantically sending you. Oh, sure, go ahead! Excellent idea, ask the really hot guy stocking shelves where the pads are! No dad, not pads, tampons! Do I look impressed?

“Do you want wings or no wings?!”

Why are you yelling! Inside voice dad!! Let’s just pretend that never happened.

Or you know what’s even better? When it’s not a complete stranger. Let’s just put the icing on the cake. Nope, it’s a teacher!

In August my mum and I were in Winner’s shopping for a summer dress for me. I had already put the dress I liked on hold and we were just picking it up so this should not have been such an ordeal. But it always is. Damn you Murphy’s Law! Oh how lovely. Look who it is. It’s two teachers from my school and their son. Now as Mia mentioned earlier, I quite frequently forget that teacher’s have lives outside of school. They aren’t supposed to just show up at shopping malls and grocery stores. It’s just not allowed. Who are we kidding, of course it’s allowed. And of course my mum has to hold up my (absolutely adorable, might I add) jean dress and ask “Is this appropriate for school?” I guess this was just her idea of a joke. Just hilarious, mum! Everyone’s just about to split a gut laughing! Okay. So what? It’s not that embarrassing. My face begs to differ. I can feel the colour inching up from my neck and into my face. Why? Why does this happen to me? I hate it when my face goes fuchsia. Because then all I can think about is how red my face is and it doesn’t stop, it just gets worse and worse. And I am baking alive in whatever I’m wearing and really just need to get outside into some fresh air. But instead I stand there awkwardly smiling and nodding pretending to follow along with the conversation even though I stopped paying attention a good 20 minutes ago. AWKWARD!!!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Twenty Six: Touching a persons boobs on accident

This is awkward. You are awkwardly trying to give someone a hug, with stuff in your hands, and you accidentally touch their tata's on the way. Their reaction can be several things: 1. Laugh awkwardly 2. Actually laugh with you (depending how close you are with them) 3. Look at you like your a creep. This situation is even more awkward when its a teacher. Yes that is right I touched my teachers boobs. I happen to be pretty close with this teacher so I went into her class to tell her I got a job. I put some of her hand cream on, because that is what I always do, and she is shouting and screaming excitedly. She goes and hugs Georgie and then comes to give me a hug. I am holding my binder,which is slipping out of my hands and putting hand cream on, when she comes to embrace me. Me, trying to hug her back, accidentally touch her boobs. We both noticed, but luckily she thought it was funny. But still SOOOO AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Twenty Five: Elevators!

How awkward are elevators! There are just soooo many different things that make elevators utterly awkward! First, there is small talk. Once you get past “Hello, how are you?” or “Good morning/evening” there is not much more to say. So then you are left feeling awkward with nothing else to say. Or, there is always the chance you’ll be with some good looking. Your face flushes, you try to act normal and wait for those doors to open. Then you run. Ohh, or you could get stuck with a lovey dovey couple. They are making out, and you try not to stare. It make for an awfully long ride. Full elevators suck as well. You try to squish in without touching anyone else. It pretty awkward being stuck face to face with a complete stranger . What isn’t awkward about an elevator!? That’s why when the doors open and it’s empty, I smile to myself and enjoy the ride! Elevators equal AWKWARD.

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Twenty Four: Trying to be friends because someone wants you to be

You know how when you first meet someone there are those awkward little moments? Like you not knowing what the hell to say to them and constantly mapping out what you are going to say next. It's even worse when it's a completely planned friendship. Like when you try to be friends with a friend's friend or you know when your dad wants you to be friends with a random girl from school because he works with her dad. It just creates this weird pressure and then suddenly there is NOTHING to talk about. Even small talk seems like too much (God, I hate small talk). And then your dad arranges a completely awkward hangout and you go see 27 Dresses and you awkwardly stand in line and talk about boring crap like french homework and then you go sit in a theatre for an hour and a half and then wait awkwardly for your parents to pick you up. The awkward smile, the awkward "We should do thinks again!" and then the best part. You go on with your lives and never talk again! That was an awkward hour and a half I will never get back. But thanks dad for the fun, not at all arranged mini friendship! Awkward!
-Flora

Awkward Moment Twenty Three: Peeing in a public washroom

Why is this awkward? It really shouldn't be. We all do this, it's just a part of life. But personally, I hate peeing in a public washroom. It isn't so bad if there's a lot of people in there and they're talking loudly or the sink is running or the hand dryer is on. But when it is only you and a few other people who decide to conveniently pick this time to NOT talk then it is awkward. I am oh-so-aware of the loud sound of my pee splashing in the toilet. It is pretty much self-explanatory. Nobody likes to have the whole world hear them pee. AWKWARD!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Twenty Two: When someone is staring at you

This is extremely awkward. You are just casually walking when you see someone flat out staring at you. Not just a quick glance. FULL ON STARING! You don't even know what to do. Even when you look at them they still continue! You have two options. One, you can either smile at them, or two, awkwardly stand there stiff as a rock. Of course I choose the second one because that's the "normal" thing to do. This always happens to me when I go to my brother's rugby game. Its a bunch of 14-15 year old boys. These people are not even discreet about it. Like come on, I can see your head cranked all the way around to look at me. This past weekend my family and I went to the states with my brother's rugby team. They had a game and we wanted to do a bit of shopping. So we were in Costco getting some groceries and we see two of the starers. These two are the worst. So there they are staring at me with little smirks on their faces. I avoid eye contact and stand still. To make matters worse my mom likes to point out that they are staring. I just feel extremely awkward! This is when I wish my brother was older than me and then I wouldn't mind two older boys staring at me. Not two immature boys! AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Twenty One: Trying to act normal around a good looking person/seeing someone outside of school.

Well. That’s quite the title.
Why am I so awkward? I apparently cannot be normal around anyone slightly good looking. It sucks.
So, I went to the dollar store with my mum and grandma. We took our time looking around. I was babysitting later that night so my mum told me to look for something to bring for the kids. I don’t know if it’s only my family, but whenever we go to the dollar store, or anywhere with cheap prices we end up spending a fortune! So anyway, we spent at least a good hour looking around because my grandma has a sponsor child in Africa and she wanted to get him something. My mum and I didn’t plan on buying anything besides whatever I chose for babysitting yet she somehow managed to get a couple armfuls worth or stuff. Then she was done. There were two tills open. One with an old lady, and the other with someone very good looking that goes to my school. Great. I tried to send messages through my mind to my mum to go to the old lady! Lets just say I don’t have that kind of ability. She strolled right on over to Jason’s till. I try, I really do, but I can’t help but be awkward. Unlike Mia, I didn’t try to hide. I smiled and squeaked a hello. I could feel my face flush to a bright shade of red. I’m pretty sure the whole town could hear the sound of my heart as well. He was nice enough, I just can’t control myself. Especially with small talk. It's the worst! Anywhooo, then he told us the total and my mum handed him one of her MANY cards. Credit, debit who knows what it was, but they don’t accept it! My mum didn’t bring any other money so we had to pack up our stuff and put it all back. Uhhhhhg. So awkward. Then I had to go find my grandma and ask her to buy the toys I chose for babysitting. When she was done shopping, guess who’s till she decides to go through? Yuup. Jasons’s.
The whole situation was very AWKWARD!!
-Georgie

Awkward Moment Twenty: The Third Wheel

We all know how this goes. You are hanging out with a few of your friends when suddenly you are left alone with your friend and their boyfriend. Maybe this shouldn't be awkward but it is. This is especially bad when the couple is really affectionate and cutesy You sort of make lame conversation while they act all coupley. My inner monologue goes like this : "would it be really obvious if I just left right now? Am I allowed to look at them? Am I allowed to look in her boyfriend's direction? Oh my god, what if she thinks I am checking him out? Shut up you are being paranoid. Shit, now they are making out. Is ten seconds enough time to stay? Okay now I am just standing here watching them like a creep.Okay.I am leaving." Then I sort of say bye quietly because I don't want to be rude and they don't answer and it just adds to the wonderful awkwardness. See that is the problem with being single. It is absolutely fine hanging out with a couple when there are a few other people to balance things out but it is so awkward when it's a couple plus one. And I always feel like they should know how awkward it is! How do they not know? It's like when the couple that is incessantly going at it decides that your locker is the comfiest locker to make out against. We all know an over the top couple like this that acts as though cupid has a gun to their head.So you kind of awkwardly say excuse me and it take a lot of repeating yourself for them to hear. Then they look at you as if you had just disturbed their honey moon and it's like "Oh I am sorry, should we work out a schedule for when I can and cannot go to my locker?". So.Damn.Awkward.
- Flora

Awkward Moment Nineteen: The Dentist

Oh, the dentist. Everybody's favourite place to be. No one can really say that trying to carry a conversation while lying awkwardly in a big dentist chair with people drilling and sticking pointy metal objects in their mouth is NOT awkward. Come on. We all know it is.

Going to the dentist makes me extremely nervous, not gonna lie. I always feel like they're going to do something really unexpected like whip out some pliers and yank out every single last one of my teeth. But I guess they aren't really allowed to do that. I just worry. Anyways, my first trip to my new dentist office was fine: the girl was really nice and she didn't intimidate me. But then the last time I went it was just my luck. My dental hygenist was this really hot guy who was in his twenties and just so damn fine. Right away I knew how this would go. He told me to lie down in the unfortunate dentist chair and gave me an even more unfortunate pair of glasses to wear before shining the overhead light in my eyes. I lay there feeling a bit like a beached whale, unable to move while people goggle and stare at me. Well one person. But one really really really good looking person. I waited until the unevitable came. Awkward small talk. I hate it so much. He asks me what grade I'm in, what school I go to, all the while cleaning my teeth with his annoying little tooth-cleaner. How does he expect me to answer him?! My mouth is in a semi-permanent state of paralysis! I can't feel my goddamn tongue! The back of my throat is flooding with saliva that I am unable to swallow since it all tastes like disgusting fluoridey toothpaste. And still, he rattles on and on as I spit saliva everywhere while attempting to answer. Way to make my life difficult. Finally, he is finished. The dentist comes in for a while and now I have two people staring at my teeth. Then he leaves and my future boyfriend asks me to swish some fluoride around my mouth for a minute. I stand there awkwardly by the sink and try not to gag on the disgusting liquid. Thank goodness he isn't still asking me questions. I would seriously question his ability to think if he thought I could answer him while swirling fluoride around in my mouth. A minute is up and he tells me to spit in the sink. Damn it. Why? How do I do this without looking completely disgusting? All I can hope is it won't be that gross stringy kind of spit that just clings desperately to the edge of my lip. Luckily it's not. I can still taste the fluoride but don't want to keep spitting in case he thinks it's weird. I hate the dentist. AWKWARD!!!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Eighteen: Planes

Planes are extremely awkward! Especially when you have to go to the bathroom. First you have to awkwardly get up and politely ask the person next to you to move. While doing this you try ever so carefully not to land 'gracefully' in their lap. Second you have to have the right timing. You need to make sure the stewardesses are not in the isle with the big carts that take up the whole width. You also need to go when their is no line up. So you are not awkwardly standing there getting in every ones way. Lastly, the trek back to your isle. Sometime you walk past it in confusion. People are staring at you and you are once again the annoying one getting in every ones way.

Last spring break was my first ever plane ride! All is going well until I decide to guzzle a vitamin water plus the free drinks they give you on the plane. This causing me to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. It wasn't so bad because my mom was beside my. First I have to wait in a line up and numerous people are trying to get through and I am confused and awkward. Next I see the huge stinkin' cart coming straight towards me. So now I am trying to make room for this thing to get through, casually falling onto the person in the rows lap. You heard me right lap. I was so incredibly awkward I didn't even know how to react. Finally its my turn to go to the bathroom. After I am done, I leave the bathroom and see and even longer line up than before. I walk to the end of the line up and look around spaztically for my parents. I am whipping my head around looking for them. Because you know they could of jumped off the plane or something. I finally spot them... halfway down the line up. So I once again have to be 'that person' and make my way up the isle. Let me tell you the isles can only fit one person. The whole time my mom was laughing at me. It was all just too AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Seventeen: Bus Stops!

I don’t have a particular story about bus stops, I just find them ridiculously awkward. I have to take the bus to school everyday. Everyday, I wait, standing awkwardly, for the bus to come. For some reason I feel the need to leave 10 minutes before the bus comes, when I live about 30 seconds away from the bus stop. Why? I don’t know, I’m paranoid. So I stand there by myself on a busy road. There are always tons of cars passing. I must looked so thrilled…. I mean I love waiting! Anyways, I always see the same people, and the same cars. First, there are the people who go to my school who can drive themselves. They are the worst. I get the stare down from them. Then there are the creepy men. Actually, they are tied with being the worst. I can see them staring. It’s not like they have tinted windows, yet they continue to eye me. I can feel my face flush, and look like a complete idiot trying to look everywhere besides the creepy man car. It doesn’t help when they honk. Then when I finally see the bus coming I have to check my ticket to make sure it’s not used, although I’ve already checked 10 times while waiting for it. Also, I don’t know where to look! Do I stare at the bus while its driving up the road? Do I look around and just wait? Should I look forward and pretend I don’t see it until it gets closer? I tend to do all three so it looks like I have some weird twitch going on. When I finally get on it seems like everyone is avoiding eye contact. No one talks, it’s odd. It’s especially fun when the driver starts to drive before you are sitting down. I usually stumble and smile to myself. People must think I’m nuts. Oh well!
Even though I have taken the bus numerous time, I still find the situation extremely AWKWARD!

-Georgie!

Awkward Moment Sixteen: Dreams About People You Don't Really Know

So, it's time to get up and get ready for school. You've been dragged out of bed against your will and wrenched out of whatever dream you were in the middle of. You wake up feeling weird and uncomfortable and you are wondering "why was I dreaming of making out with that random in Math class?" Or you wake up disgusted by your subconcious because you dreamt about someone you really despise. Or you dreamt about someone really hot and you enjoyed your dream and you wished that you didn't have to wake up right that second. Either way it doesn't really matter if you don't know the person that well or even at all. Because then you have to go to school and see them in your classes or in the hall and then you try not to look them in the eyes or look at them at all and then you feel like you are making it even more obvious. You feel like there is a huge tattoo on your forehead that says "I dreamt we made out "( and I am being PG, it can get more awkward). Whenever this happens to me I feel like I am being really obvious about it and I get all flustered and tongue tied and red and it's like I suddenly have a crush on them or something when I (usually) don't. And I can't explain my weird behavior. What would I say ? " Oh, I know I am acting like a freak show, I am really sorry because I didn't really think about you till now but apparently my subconcious wants to jump your bones." One time I dreamt I made out with this guy I was sort of friends with through a friend of mine. Anyway, I was pretty good friends with her at the time so one day I just told her about the dream and she thought it was hilarious so she marched me up to him and made me tell him my dream. Until he went back to Germany he would always jokingly wink at me and be like "You still dreaming about me?". Oh and here is the best part. My friend and him started going out like a week later. So awkward! I learned to keep stuff to my self. Actually that's a lie I have an overshare problem. But what other people should learn from this is to keep their awkward dreams about strangers to themselves. Because no one really needs to know every single thought that runs though your head. Awkward!
- Flora

Awkward Moment Fifteen: First Dates

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Here is an especially awkward blog for you. The famous and not-so-fabulous first date. Everyone goes through this at some point. When someone asks you out there are generally 3 (always awkward!) responses and feelings. You either:

a) Really like the guy. This makes it awkward because you have to try your hardest to impress them and act as normal as possible so you don't scare them off and so you can hopefully score a second date. 

b) Really hate the guy. Really, you're only saying yes because you feel bad. Ahh, the sympathy date. Or..

c) Neither like or hate him and say yes because you want to give him a chance and you like the idea of him. And you think that maybe you can grow to like him. Also, you see no reason to not like him. This can definitely be awkward!

My last dating experience was the latter. I was quite convinced that if I just gave him a chance, then he must be right for me! I loved that he liked me, and was very flattered. But you can't make yourself like someone. So off we went on our date to the movies. The awkwardness starts in the line-up to pay for our tickets. He offers to pay, and I politely reply "Are you sure? " And he looks so uncertain that I end up paying. Then we get into the theatre. We look around for seats when I spot a teacher from school and her boyfriend. Just my luck. I avoid eye contact and march straight to the top of the theatre, as far away from my teacher as possible. We sit there munching on some popcorn and it's all okay until I notice his arm casually on the arm rest lying with his hand facing palm up. Hmm. It's almost as if he wants to hold my hand. I glance at it, ignore it, and continue to watch the movie. Of course I would pick a sappy romantic comedy. Which always means awkward sex scenes, just to add to the fun. Once the movie is over, we walk out into the brightly lit entrance. Here I notice my teacher and her boyfriend, once again. They're walking right in front of us and I get that awkward feeling like I am stalking them. I don't want to say hi because that would be the logical thing to do and me, being awkward, would never do that. Uh oh, now we're at the door, and she's holding it open for us, and I am looking everywhere but at her, and I am oh-so-aware of the bright lights shining on us like a spotlight, and my date beside me, and my teacher in front of me, and.. PHEW finally we're outside. I gasp for fresh air and try to release the tension that is building in my shoulders from all that awkward. We begin the walk to his car. Once again, he attempts to hold my hand by reaching out his hand towards me and saying "come on, my car's this way". Once again, I look at his desperately outstretched hand and ignore it. Once we're safely in his car and driving home, I look through the songs on his Ipod. I am an idiot. I choose Taylor Swift "Our Song", and while it's blasting I casually comment "hey, this song's rather appropriate!" He smiles, and then says "You should learn how to drive with one hand." 

"Why?"

"So you can have one hand free for the music.. and the dials.. and so I can hold your hand." He reaches for my hand and this time there is no avoiding it. We sit there in awkward silence. The car ride takes years. Finally, FINALLY, I am home. He walks me to the door, and not knowing how to say goodbye, I give him a quick hug. What a date. AWKWARD!!!!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Fourteen: Seeing Teachers in Public

This is extremely awkward. When you see a teacher in public you almost forget that teachers are human beings that actually have a life. I am under the impression that teachers only work. That is the only thing they do. They go to school, teach, and mark homework. They are not allowed to do anything else. So whenever I see a teacher out of school I am shocked out of my mind! And I am excessively awkward. More awkward then seeing an acquaintance from school.
This weekend I was at the mall with my mom and grandmother. We went to a town that's about one hour from my real town so I knew I would not see anyone I know. I was feeling rather thirsty so we went to Starbucks to quench my thirst. The line up was remarkably long. As we reached the top I was looking the display cabinet and I turn around to see a teacher from my school, who I had in grade 8, standing in the line up. I quickly turn around, not knowing what to do with myself. My mom asks me if I know that man because he is smiling at her. I couldn't exactly turn around now because I wanted to be stealth. I walk over to get my drink, avoiding eye contact. I felt really bad though because I knew he saw me look. So I glace up and he is staring at me so I wave. Not a normal wave though. An awkward one. A Flora Wave. If you knew Flora then you would know exactly what I was talking about! Anyways the situation was completely AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Thirteen: A slip of the tongue.

This is a good one. A slip of the tongue make situations extremely awkward and hilarious. It can be anything from telling the guy you like you love him on a first date, or trying to come up with a nickname for someone named Gisele, and calling her Jizzy, to accidentally saying orgasm in biology instead of organism. It’s funny when it happens to someone else, but when you’re the one saying it, the situation because very awkward and embarrassing.

     When my mum was a little girl she lived about 2 minutes away from the local gas station. Every week she would go and buy a treat for herself. Unlike today’s gas stations, all the candy was behind the counter, and you would have to tell the clerk what you wanted. So one day she got to the gas station and was very excited to buy herself Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. She said to the clerk, “Can I please have Reese‘s penis butter cups.” She was so humiliated and felt so awkward (she was just a little girl), that she turned around and ran out. She didn’t even get her Reese's Peanut Butter Cups!  So AWKWARD!!

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Twelve: Accidently taking someone elses clothes

I just want to start out by saying, thank god that I no longer have gym class. Those smelly,awkward, embarassing days of tripping and accidently kicking people in soccer are over.The unfortunate sweat and gymclothes. The unfortunate sweat and gym clothes that the guys in p.e class have to see. The unfortunate sweaty guys that I have to see(or smell). It's just not good and it is the perfect place for awkward moments to occur. The changeroom is an excellent place for awkward moments. I am not exactly a prude but I still feel a little awkward when I have to full on strip down to my bra and panties in front of girls I don't really know. It might be a little immature of me but I feel uncomfortable. Where do you look in the changeroom? I mean, there isn't anywhere to look except down or at my clothes so I used to just grab my clothes and get dressed at light speed and think to myself "no one is looking, calm yourself". That was pretty much the story of my life for every gym class until one day. I'd just had an unfortunately awkward day of p.e where I had to make up a dance with a group and I had to line dance to "Beat it. I had to do the thriller zombie hand dance thing to and it was infront of all three p.e classes in that block.Sometimes I wonder if teachers just do things like that for entertainment. They probably do (I'd do the same thing if I was a teacher). Anyway, so I was still recovering when I went into the changeroom and grabbed my clothes and practically ran into a bathroom stall. That's when I heard "Hey! those are MY clothes. What are you doing?" And so with my shirt half off I looked down and realized they weren't my clothes they were just similar colours. I opened the door, there was that awkward moment of having to laugh and be like ' oh my god, haha I am such a cluts haha!' then I gave them to her and apologized and she said it was okay but OH MY GOD! It was such a painfully awkward moment that it was funny and it almost cheered me up, except it didn't. Because it was really, really awkward.
- Flora

Awkward Moment Eleven: Standing by yourself in a public place and trying to look cool.

Here is how it all begins. You're standing with a group of friends waiting for your ride after school. Slowly, they all start to leave and before you know it you're left standing alone by the fence, staring at the ground, at your phone with its non-existent text messages, at the inside of your purse, anything to avoid the heavy air, thick with silence. I don't know what it is, but it seems like people to need to feel occupied at all times, especially when standing by yourself in a public place.

So there I was, all alone and trying to act casually nonchalant about being a complete loner. It was a swelteringly hot day in May and there were these annoying bees buzzing around. I wasn't too bothered until one began to repeatedly dive-bomb at my face. I tried to stealthily swat it away, probably giving bystanders the impression that I had a nervous twitch. But to no avail; it just wouldn't leave me alone. And then there it was, flying back towards my head, making that awful "ZZZZZZ" sound right in my ear. I began shaking my head with my eyes squeezed shut, hoping against hope that it wouldn't sting me. I was feeling very awkward and wasn't paying much attention to what I was doing. Suddenly I realized that my thoughts, which usually do a decent job of staying in my brain, had decided to slip into the back of my throat and out of my mouth. "It-it-it's a bee!" I stuttered, as if the rest of the world had no stinkin' clue what it was. I did a quick side-eyes to check if anyone around me was looking. That was when I noticed Mia and Georgie in the car parked by the curb in front of me. I took a few steps forward and smiled at the glass. I began to say something out loud (as if they could hear me), and was about to put my face up to the window when the car pulled away. I made an awkward laugh/choking noise and went back to the spot where I had been standing. AWKWARD!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Ten: When you see someone from school or work in public

You know the moment when you see someone you are not really friends with, but you have talked to them a few times. Once you spot them you are desperately trying to hide and avoid eye contact. You will do anything to avoid them. Sometimes hiding behind magazines, ducking in and out of isles, hiding behind clothes, quickly running away.. ANYTHING! But once they see you or start talking to you it is just awkward. I don't know about you but my face goes completely red. I am talking tomato red! I don't even know why! I am not even embarrassed!! It is so annoying though!

This happens to me all the time!! Like once a week it feels like! The most recent time was at the grocery store with my mom. When I am with my friends it not that bad, but when I am with family I feel awkward, not embarrassed though. When it is time to go to the check out, we pick a great line up! Its short and I do not know the person working at the till. Until I guess the first girls shift was over. You could probably picture my face. I decide to read the magazines, avoiding any awkward confrontation, until a line up forms behind me and people are trying to put their groceries on the belt. So I am now stuck behind their cart, forcing me to go into the other line up and go around, back to the exit of my line up. After standing there for what seems like 100 years, we are almost done. Until silly me decides to make eye contact! And then the awkward small talk begins! She is asking me about school and I do not even know what to do with myself, giving one word answers, smiling awkwardly, and face as red a tomato! To make matters worse she has that look on her face like she was thinking "what on earth is this girls problem." AWKWARD!

-Mia

Awkward Moment Nine: Watching an inappropriate movie with your parents.

     I don’t know who hasn’t experienced this. How awkward is it when your watching an R rated, completely inappropriate movie with your parents. You all know something awkward to watch is about to pop up on the screen. A steamy love scene perhaps? Whatever kind of scene it is, there is no way of avoiding the awkwardness. When this happens, my whole body stiffens and the room goes unbearably silent. Of course my parents feel awkward and uncomfortable too. None of us know what to do with ourselves. It’s such a relief when what seems like a 3 hour scene is finally over! What more can I say. AWKWARD!!

-Georgie

Awkward Moment Eight: Brain on autopilot, mouth still moving

It happens. You have had a long day of communicating with other people, you are tired and just want to go home, chill and maybe do some homework (or not) but you still have some crap to do.Joy. Maybe it's a job, after school activity or volunteering, so you slap a smile on your face and make half-ass, polite conversation with people you don't know that well and you act as though you are having the time of your life. It's comfortable, it's not exactly thrilling, but it keeps you from being bored and awkward. Next thing you know, whoever you are talking to is looking at you as though you have two heads and all you can think is ....... did I really just say that? This happened to me a few weeks ago. I volunteer after school at a care home for the elderly. I actually do enjoy it! But it was a Thursday which is my favorite day of the week because it's the day before Friday, my favorite show is on and I have a yoga class. I only had ten minutes of volunteering left and Millie (she volunteers there too) and I were talking to a very sweet old man who was giving us some very wise, albeit, depressing advice and he starts telling us that we should not get married until we are older. I told him that I want to get married when I am in my late twenties, maybe thirty and he told me that he thinks that is a good age but that we should marry someone ten years older than us. Now at this point, frankly I had no idea what was coming out of my mouth. Maybe I was smiling so big at this sweet old man that my brain wasn't functioning properly. I do not know what possessed me to say "Oh, I know. I love old men!". As soon as I said it I was like what did I just say? Did I just accidently hit on an old man?No!! and I tried to play it off saying "I mean, older, older men....". Millie was standing there looking both amused and weirded out. She was like "What was that Flora?". Luckily he didn't seem to hear my moment of word vomit but it still was pretty awkward. What if he had heard?!? I would have passed out from embarrassment. The moral of the story is watch what you say or you might accidently say something odd and have a scarring awkward moment. So. Awkward.
-Flora

Awkward Moment Seven: Laughing at something that no one else finds funny

I have this problem. I laugh at everything, even things that really aren't that funny. And isn't it just so awkward when you get started and just can't stop? In fact, the more you try to stop the more you laugh. It just causes problems, because then you're trying to contain it and it comes out sounding like a dying cat or a snort. And then people look at you funny and you laugh harder. And then you laugh at your own laughter and eventually forget why you even started laughing in the first place.

This basically happens to me every day of my life. But there was this one time that was especially awkward. My friend Penny and I went to another friend's birthday party. We were the only one's there that didn't know anyone else. We were all sitting around the table eating veggies and dip and no one was talking, so Penny decides to loudly announce "I'm allergic to dip!" while simultaneously scooping up a huge spoonful of it for her carrots. Everyone just stared at her, deadpan expressions on their faces. I nervously laughed, knowing she is not allergic to dip, how can you even be allergic to dip! Realizing that people were taking her very seriously, Penny says "Just kidding!" and starts to laugh hysterically. I guess she was just trying to make conversation, which clearly did not go well. Everyone continues to stare and suddenly overcome by how funny the situation is, I start laughing uncontrollably along with her. We are in absolute stitches and clutching our stomachs, tears sliding down our cheeks. We can barely look at each other because it just makes us laugh harder. Once we regain control of ourselves we look up and realize that everyone is standing up and slowly inching towards the door, with a mixture of concern and grave seriousness plastered over their faces. It makes me want to start yelling like a crazy person "I'm not insane!!! Stop staring at me! I'm completely normal!" But I don't think that would solve anything. The entire party then proceeds to leave the room and Penny and I just sit there in silence, grinning at each other. It is one of those situations that only ever happens in the movies; a group of strangers' jaws just hanging open like that, with wide eyes and nervous looks exchanged amongst all. SO awkward.
-Millie

Awkward Moment Six: When you're walking down the street and your umbrella goes inside out!

I hate when this happens! It's not so bad if you are walking down a quite road with no cars, but if is a super busy road, it can lead to some awkward moments. The other day I was walking to meet Millie to go out for breakfast. It was pouring rain and the wind started to blow. I just continued walking down my quiet street, unaffected by the wind. But then I reached the highway, and it starts storming! It was almost like the wind had something against me. By now my umbrella was pulling out of my hands. I thought I was going to be like Mary Poppins and start flying in the air. Just when I get to the busiest part of the road my umbrella goes inside out! I quickly close my umbrella and decide to wear my hood. I am standing at the corner, waiting to cross the street, and silly me decides to put my umbrella up once again because now I am soaking wet. As I try to open it a big gust of wind comes, causing my umbrella to flip inside out and breaks it. I continue to open it. Why you may ask? Who knows! I should have just left it and saved myself the awkwardness and embarrassment. As I try to open it I look to my right and see someone from my school in their nice dry car watching me, all wet and looking like a crazy person. AWKWARD!


- Mia

Awkward Moment Five: Hot tubs.

I don’t know about you guys, but I feel quite awkward while sitting in a full hot tub. Maybe it’s just because I’m socially awkward, but I do not know what to do with myself. Everywhere I look, a strangers face is staring back at me. Ugh, it make me so uncomfortable! I sit there in silence, not wanting to draw any attention to myself. Anyone know this feeling?


     Every year my family and I go away in the summer. One day my grandma, my sister and I were sitting in the hot tub. It was getting close to the maximum capacity of like 15 people. Everyone was minding their own business when all of the sudden my grandma said, “Well this is fun. All these strangers not talking but sitting half naked together in a hot tub!” I was in shock. I couldn’t believe she had just said that! There were a few quiet giggles, but I think everyone was a little grossed out. Personally, it left me feeling mortified, and super awkward!
-Georgie

Awkward Moment Four: Being in a class without any friends and acting like a fool

You know that moment when you are trapped in a sewing class against your will with no friends and you get your foot caught in a girl you don't know's yoga pants and you trip and then hop out and say sorry and act like it was funny and that you don't want to go die now? No? Last year I was in sewing and I basically had no friends in that class and so I was like okay I'll go sew and hope the class goes by quickly. On my way to my sewing machine my foot managed to get caught in the bottom of this girl's yoga pants. Like I had to full on hop away because my foot was caught. How that happens I have no idea. So I got all flustered, said sorry and smiled and laughed like I thought it was stinking hilarious and she was nice about it but still. Awkward! I mean being trapped in a class with no friends, trying to act like you are not a complete loser is bad enough. It happens to all of us and I feel like I usually do a pretty good job of dealing with these awkward little classes. I just tell myself I don't feel awkward and I pretend to be busy and I think sarcastic thoughts and ask to go to my locker/the bathroom a lot. I try not to stare in any one place to long in case I accidently space out and look somewhere awkward ie. someones crotch or boobs. It never fails, when you try to act "normal" or "cool" you always end up acting like a weirdo. Awkward city.
-Flora

Awkward Moment Three: When you wear an article of clothing straight from the dryer and a pair of underwear is balled up inside the sleeve.

You know what is extremely awkward? When you spend an entire day with a pair of underwear inside the sleeve of your sweatshirt. You were rushed that morning and quickly pulled out a sweater from the dryer, and obviously didn't think to check inside the sleeves in case some socks or underwear tumbled in there. Oh, what a mistake.

This happened to me a few weeks ago, and I FINALLY noticed during the last block of the day at school. I felt something lumpy in my sleeve and was just about to whip it out when I thought I'd better check what it was before revealing it to the whole world. So I'm sitting there, looking around sketchily, and trying to casually take a peek inside my sleeve. Oh, it wasn't just any pair of underwear. Nope, it was a bright purple stripy thong. Just awesome. I could feel myself getting flushed and embarrassed, despite the fact that nobody had any idea of the little dilemma I was experiencing. My thoughts were frantic, "What do I do now? How do I stealthily get this out of my sleeve?" Sure, there are probably tons of logical ways to solve this problem but I was thinking a bit irrationally at that point. I ended up sticking my arm inside my backpack and inching it slowly out of my sleeve, all while trying to carry on a conversation with a guy in my grade. Luckily he had no idea what was going on. Even more luckily he can not read minds, or else he would have been seeing a lot of potentially disastrous scenarios involving me putting my hand up to ask a question in class and my stripy purple underwear flying across the room and everyone pointing and laughing. People may be under the assumption that awkward situations must involve more than one person. Nope, not true. That was my own little awkward experience that was a secret to everyone except me. It left me feeling very awkward and sketchy and not too sure what to do with myself. AWKWARD!
-Millie

Awkward Moment Two: Not being able to understand someone with an accent

   This has happened to all of us. Someone starts talking to you but you can't understand a word they say because of their accent. This makes the situation incrediblyawkward! But you just stand there and nod your head saying "yeah...". They know that you have no idea what their talking about but you pretend you do. From now on the situation is awkward!
   
  A similar situation happened to me. About two years ago, Georgie and I were ordering pizza. I called the number and was ready to place my order. An Asian lady, with a really thick accent, answered the phone and started talking. At first I could sort of understand what she was saying. Then she started asking me all these questions and I could not understand for the life of me. I swear it was not English! I was all confused and couldn't respond so before placing my order I hung up. I called again hoping for someone else to answer. The phone rang and rang. Guess whose little voice I hear on the other line? The same woman! It would not have been so bad but I had to give my phone number again. She obviously knew it was the same person. AWKWARD.......
-Mia

Awkward Moment One: When you can't tell if someone is a guy, or a girl...

How awkward is it when you meet someone for the first time and cannot, for the life of you, figure out if it is a boy, or a girl!? It’s horrible. You spend the rest of your day creepily sneaking glances at it. It’s honestly all you can think about, until you figure out its gender.
     One summer, I went to the fair with my family. All was going well, until we met up with my friend. She had another friend with her. This particular friend had short hair, was wearing no makeup, had a ton of piercings, and was wearing baggy clothes. I would have thought it was a boy except for the fact is also looked like a girl. I was bamboozled! Was it a girl, or was a boy? I waited to hear its name. Dakota. Mmhhmm. So that didn’t help. I figured I really didn’t need to know its gender, so I ignored my curiosity. Then my friend suggested we go on the roller coaster, only problem was that her friend needed someone to ride with. So, of course, I said, “I‘ll ride with him.”
She was a girl, not a guy. AWKWARD!
-Georgie

Welcome to our world.

Hi! We're the awkward bloggers! We would like to share our awkward experiences with the rest of the world! Everyone has their moments of extreme awkwardness and we're all in this together, so we might as well be awkward.. together. This introduction is feeling pretty awkward to me. Anyways, our names are Millie, Flora, Georgie and Mia. We also have a youtube channel so check it out and make sure to subscribe! And feel free to share your awkward experiences with us!

-The Awkward Bloggers