Oh, the dentist. Everybody's favourite place to be. No one can really say that trying to carry a conversation while lying awkwardly in a big dentist chair with people drilling and sticking pointy metal objects in their mouth is NOT awkward. Come on. We all know it is.
Going to the dentist makes me extremely nervous, not gonna lie. I always feel like they're going to do something really unexpected like whip out some pliers and yank out every single last one of my teeth. But I guess they aren't really allowed to do that. I just worry. Anyways, my first trip to my new dentist office was fine: the girl was really nice and she didn't intimidate me. But then the last time I went it was just my luck. My dental hygenist was this really hot guy who was in his twenties and just so damn fine. Right away I knew how this would go. He told me to lie down in the unfortunate dentist chair and gave me an even more unfortunate pair of glasses to wear before shining the overhead light in my eyes. I lay there feeling a bit like a beached whale, unable to move while people goggle and stare at me. Well one person. But one really really really good looking person. I waited until the unevitable came. Awkward small talk. I hate it so much. He asks me what grade I'm in, what school I go to, all the while cleaning my teeth with his annoying little tooth-cleaner. How does he expect me to answer him?! My mouth is in a semi-permanent state of paralysis! I can't feel my goddamn tongue! The back of my throat is flooding with saliva that I am unable to swallow since it all tastes like disgusting fluoridey toothpaste. And still, he rattles on and on as I spit saliva everywhere while attempting to answer. Way to make my life difficult. Finally, he is finished. The dentist comes in for a while and now I have two people staring at my teeth. Then he leaves and my future boyfriend asks me to swish some fluoride around my mouth for a minute. I stand there awkwardly by the sink and try not to gag on the disgusting liquid. Thank goodness he isn't still asking me questions. I would seriously question his ability to think if he thought I could answer him while swirling fluoride around in my mouth. A minute is up and he tells me to spit in the sink. Damn it. Why? How do I do this without looking completely disgusting? All I can hope is it won't be that gross stringy kind of spit that just clings desperately to the edge of my lip. Luckily it's not. I can still taste the fluoride but don't want to keep spitting in case he thinks it's weird. I hate the dentist. AWKWARD!!!
-Millie
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